Psych 201

It's a known fact that people give and receive love differently. If they are not receiving it the way they need, then they start feeling unloved, uncherished, not appreciated or special. In most instances, the person who feels neglected will withdrawn (not talk), complain (as a way to express what they want) or simply give up. The biggest breakdown in relationships is a lack of communicating those needs. If a couple wants to remain close, in love and together it is imperative that they find out how their lover best receives love and find ways to fulfill those needs.

Some people are auditory- they like to HEAR things. They interpret the world or perceive their lives by listening and hearing. They are very moved by music, sounds of nature and hearing their significant other say affectionate, loving things. Others are visual. They enjoy reading, writing or seeing new things. It makes their world more real or tangible if they can see it with their own two eyes. Yet there are others who are kinetic- of or relating to the motion of material bodies and the forces and energy associated therewith. They are action oriented. They like doing tasks or activities with their significant other. A simple trip to the grocery store picking out a vegetable provides them with the support and security they need to feel as if their relationship is in top notch shape!

Relationships are by no means easy. People are very different due to their personalities and/or opinions. There are many factors to take into consideration in making a relationship work. Is the couple committed? Do they have similar goals in life? What values do they share? Did they have a married couple as their role model growing up or did they come from a divorced home? Do they enjoy similar hobbies? Are they willing to give to their significant other in the way that they need to feel loved?

As people get older, of course their perspective on life changes. They start looking further into the future and evaluate what they have in their life NOW. They start to question their own mortality. They ask questions such as, "Do I want to travel the world alone?" "Do I want to share what life have left with another?" "Is the person in my life right now the one I trust to make medical decisions about my health once I can no longer make those decisions myself?" "Do I want to quite possibly make funeral arrangements for this person?" "Can I laugh and enjoy the rest of my life with this person?"

If you believe you have found the partner you want to grow old with, it is wise to learn how to give love in the way that they need. The effort will be very rewarding to you in the end.

For more information on giving love, please contact Dr. MD Huston.